Don't you love it when people in school are like, "I'm a bad test taker"? Oh, you struggle with that part where we find out what you know? Oh, how the masterpiece is crystal up here [points to head] , but once paint hits canvas, I develop Parkinson's. The worst day of fishing is better than the best day at work. Cuz Kobe was accused of rape, and all he had to do was settle in court for millions of dollars, change his jersey number and win a championship and that soulless town in LA couldn't be prouder. See, because I'm a brilliant painter, minus my God-awful brushstrokes. fishin" The first thing Michael Phelps should have done when that photo came out was call Kobe Bryant's publicist. I'm sick of the media making female sports athletes into supermodels, when they're clearly sixes at best. All three pay lip service to Rehtaeh Parsons and the Dalhousie dentistry scandal before decrying how the author is “watching a city crumble to the demands of some angry young Dal students.” The author’s hyperbolic concern stems from recent protests about the upcoming Daniel Tosh shows June 11 and 12 at the Rebecca Cohn.
In case you missed the sketch on "Tosh.0" -- the comedian dresses up like Dyrdek at a "Childish Dream Factory for Young Boys Only" ...Comedy Central blew it when they chose Trevor Noah to replace Jon Stewart as host of “The Daily Show.” Just check out his tweets, and you’ll see why: There’s also the time when the South African comedian was a new correspondent on “The Daily Show,” and he said his arms were tired from the flight to the United States. The only significant outrage leveled against him was when he supposedly made a rape joke and insulted women in the audience.“An oldie but a goodie.” No, that’s not what Noah meant. Only it never really happened the way it was described. Unlike Noah, who can joke about harming Jews and refuse to offer even a peep of remorse, when a white guy makes an imaginary joke that offends chicks, he’d better say he’s sorry. Of course, Tosh might be too white, too American, too middle-class, too cute, too much of a dude, or too politically incorrect to host “The Daily Show.” And he can be really politically incorrect.He was like, "Son, sex is a lot like this egg." "Dad, I think those are drugs." "Whatever, queer." "Why does everyone keep saying that? You take a woman and crack her over the head and lie her flat. Don't stand too close or you'll get yellow stuff all over your bacon" What? That's the lava game, when you pretend that the floor is lava and you climb up on all the furniture. I'd tell my mom, "I want a Nintendo." and she'd reply "The floor is lava! I see some of you holding your stomach and feeling: "No, you shouldn't." That's a breakfast joke. If you don't laugh at that, you're gonna be sleepy around . I've never once been at work, capsized in a 40 degree water, watched all my co-workers die, and be like, "Hey, at least we're.... Hope it was worth it charity-bangin' that geriatric for all eternity, that'll really throw the scent off the gay trail. You did it because you're a whore, you forgot because you're stupid. They can do it in Nebraska; we don't need that horrible state.